Let's talk about sex.
I had a pretty interesting conversation with a friend recently. To him, if a guy were to look for a future wife hoping she's still a virgin, well, good luck. I kind of resented his tone for it seemed to me that if a girl's no longer a virgin on her wedding day, or if her future husband's not the first guy whom she had sex with, this will somehow devalue her. How archaic is this thought?
I got an interesting forwarded mail from U-Jean a while back. It's about how a woman's value is determined not by what society deemed is right, but by her own choice. An excerpt from the article below:
"Typically, there is a whole lot of talk about a woman's honour and 'worth' (and again described in archaic terms), but very little on her choice.
Tell me something new. Tell me about a woman's choice to choose, a woman's choice to interpret her dignity and self-worth in her own terms. Why have we not heard much about men being virgins? Why is a woman's Self-Worth being defined by a tiny piece of skin, a few inches of cloth (either too much / the lack thereof) ?
Tell me about a Woman's Right to Choose what she wants to do with her Body. Tell me about a Woman's Right to Decide how she wants to express her Self-Worth. Tell me about a Woman's Right to Honour Herself in a way she seems fit. Tell me about a Woman's Right to Determine for Herself."
All along, it has not been about what people say is right, or what is deemed as appropriate. It is about a woman knowing her choices, and knowing what is best FOR HER.
Sex and worth talk aside, I'd like to share a link with you: World Contraception Day
It is the first website that I have been involved in from the beginning stage to the launching of the live site. The template of the site was designed by my Senior Art Director. I played a part in laying out the content and designing some of the headers you will see in some of the pages. It was a good experience to learn and see how a major site come into form from the initial planning stages, to design, to developing, to endless changes and lastly, to reality.
Do go to the site, make a pledge on contraception. Spread the word. Safe sex happens by choice, not by chance (plus, STIs are really disgusting, I should know, I was the one who layout all the disgusting pictures).
IT'S ALIVE!!!! (the site, I mean. Pardon me, but it is a pretty exhilarating feeling.)
3 comments:
well, I personally think that such issue is greatly influenced by the typical point of view of men eversince long long time ago. what important to men should not be that thin layer of tissue. that thing might even break because of some tiny accidents. be honest, we all want ourselves to be the first of our partners. problem is, we cannot guarantee our feeling toward each other to be the same even after three or four years. we still have the right to look for a second destined one, but u can't say a woman is devalued because she is no longer a virgin. what proofs her value is something more that thin skin and it's her heart worth the most! i can marry a virgin but who knows she could be a bitch after the marriage. or, i marry a not virgin girl but she treat me well and stay honest to me even after twenty years. now i ask you, which one worth for you love?
been a while since i type so long for a comment and i kinda feel like giving lecture. hahahaha!
nie gel, i agree completely with your point of view. =)
no problem with long comments. so long as you make sense. haha!
Hmm interesting say from the wasabi dude.
The Pope forbids contraception - he said no to condoms in Africa, where Aids is widespread. I think one shouldn't be too rigid with religion sometimes.
Hehe let's have our girl talk on this issue some other time. Btw there's this group on FB (that I probably joined)
"Not a virgin anymore - Adelaide Uni Engineering Degree f*ck me all the time"
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