First

After working for approximately five months (omaigawd, approaching half a year!!), I finally did what I personally think is a milestone in my career. Okay, this is where my self-conscious mode kicks in, "It's not really that nice, in fact given more time I think I can do better, and heck I'm not trying to show off!!"

BUT. I'm gonna be all professional and calmly present to you a game which I designed from beginning till the end. When I say design, I mean visually, from the characters design to the game interfaces. Programming and animation credits go to my insanely talented colleagues.

Timeline for this was tight, as was every single brief that came through our door. Unlike back in uni when we had months to work on a project, this was a luxury unseen in the working world. Due to timing and circumstances, I found myself strapped with the design for this game. Had it not for the way things happened, I might not have this awesome responsibility of working on this on my own. The first project where I can say it's my design.

There are still so much that I need to learn, sometimes I don't know where to start. But getting thrown into the deep end of the pool is good sometimes, you're forced to swim, no matter.

So do go to (http://bit.ly/share-itz) to play the game on Facebook! Play together with a friend and you might just stand a chance to win iPads and some amazing prizes!

The W Word

Work can kill the passion of what you are doing if you're not careful.

It's the repetition and ritual. Doing the same things over and over again, to a point when I'm really tired and I'll question myself, "What am I doing here?"

I'm telling myself it's still worth it.

I listened to this radio segment and the deejay was talking on the topic of leading the kind of life you want. There was this one part I couldn't help but agree. Despite all the fall backs, disappointments and doubts one might encounter, it's important to ask yourself every now and then, if whatever you're doing is leading you to the life you want.

Really, I don't know what kind of life I want. Not concretely anyways, does anyone?

All I know is if work still brings a thrill to me when I'm beat and tired, it's okay, I'm still on the right track.

Work. Sounds so much like an obligation, a responsibility. Something everyone crawls out of bed in the morning for. It's what makes Monday blue. It's what people trade their soul and passion for in exchange for bread on the table (gawd... so melodramatic).

One of my friends from secondary school just got engaged. She blogged about the whole proposal and I couldn't help but feel so touched and envious at the same time. It was the most perfect and wonderful proposal I've heard of. It's not right to compare lives, of course, but I can't help but let one of those moments creep up on me and ponder.

Surely life is supposed to be more than just work?

To Appraise

It has been three months from my first day of work. I had my probationary appraisal done and was a bag of nerves before it. I wasn't really confident if I performed well and at the same time I was very eager to know what they think of me.

At first, the group head did the appraisal with me. I guess the questions were pretty standard where I was asked a lot of questions about my experience with the company, how I think I performed and where I think I can improve. It was more like a sharing session where he got to know about my experience and I can get some of my questions answered.

After that first session I was suddenly called again to have a talk with my direct superior. It felt a little out of the blue. He sat me down in the chill room and invited me to share about my thoughts. We had a brief talk about me, him and the company. It was awesome in a way coz after coming out from the room, I was pumped to do better for myself.

All this sharing got me thinking about what I want to do for the rest of the year. A quarter of the year has passed and I am not really quite near to achieving my goals. I know 2011 is going to be hard. This is not a year to talk about reaching high and be ambitious. This year is about me sharpening my technical skills and learn as much as I can from the really great people around me.

I love working for several reasons. The best of all was being given real responsibilities, real work. It bemused me sometimes when they will just throw a job at me regardless of whether or not I know how to do it. From here, I can either do very poorly or do fine, learning along the way. It's all really cool. Another reason I like where I am right now is the people. Clearly they are good in what they do. So I think I am in an enviable position where I get the opportunity to work closely with them.

During the appraisal, Mr. Direct Superior asked me what is it that I love. Do I love design? Where does my passion lie? What is it exactly that I want?

These are questions that stumped me. I can tell you I like design. Very much. I happen to think I am of the lucky few in this world where my day job is actually my passion. Graphic design doesn't pay well for fresh grads. I am willing to endure this for I know pay will get better if only I am willing to start (I hope).

However, I have come to realise that only talking about how much I like something are merely words. If really I am passionate about something, I will be willing to sit down and just work at it. Hack hours and hours away in honing my skills. I have always believed that passion triumphs talent. But I question how passionate am I really in this. Surely where I am standing right now doesn't show what I have been saying all these while.

I cannot see where I will be in a few years' time. But I can dream of that destination. Nothing is impossible if only I start. Stop looking around and concentrate on myself.

Remaining three quarters of 2011. I am committing myself to three things:

1. Know Flash

2. Know Web

3. Illustrate

To be where I want to be, I will need to begin. So when I question myself again, I will know the answer.